Answered Prayers

Are you a person that writes your prayers down in a journal and watch God answer them? Do you write down your victories through God in a journal?  How do you remember what God has done for you lately?
I can honestly say I do not write down my prayers nor the victories in my life. I probably should, I might have something more interesting to write about. I'm just kidding.....
Well, this morning is different. You might be a little smarter than me, but I realized that I can be angry with God and he makes a way for victory; I am here to write it down. I had a situation happen that I got mad at Rodney and God. I went for a walk to talk with God the Father. I told him I didn't like what he allowed to happen, I blamed God for the decisions at hand, I was beyond mad at a few times that I wanted to throw something, scream from the top of my lungs, but instead I went shopping.  Yep, at 5:30am I was at Walmart by 5:38am. I need to mention that I took a walk at midnight yelling at God within my small voice and in my kitchen I raised my fist to the Lord, I was purely angry the night before. I woke up still angry and I tried to follow scripture “In your anger do not sin” : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,....etc. However, I did. I don't remember sleeping at all. I woke up just as mad as I did, if not more, when I woke up. Therefore, I went shoppping. On the way to the store, which by the way is empty that early in the morning and it's a great stress releaser, I stopped the car and looked at the moon because I heard a still small voice tell me to. So I did. I heard "I made that moon." I replied, "yes I know you did and it's nice." I didn't want to hear anymore so I put the car into drive and moved onward with my task at hand; shopping.
On the way home, I decided not to agree with being angry anymore. I asked God to show me why He allowed this situation to happen. Why were darts thrown at my heart like they were, why did this disagreement have to happen at this particular time in my life.
So,I brought my two bags of groceries in, went onto my porch and sat in my abmaster chair. No I did not work out, I stared at the stars and the touch of moon showing through the trees. I heard that still small voice again "relax and breathe." I took a deep breath and I began crying. I was hurt, my heart was broken. I didn't realize God was trying to change me within minutes. He wasn't. I recognized he wasn't trying to show me something, but someone else.
God's word of truth tells us But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37
Rodney and I made a decision together, we both said "yes" in agreement on a particular situation. This decision we made was a small one, the object we agreed on was a small one. However, just two days before we were to walk through the decision Rodney and I made his decision changed to "no." Now this decision cost money, time, effort, and sacrifices.
His "no, I'm not going to do this" made me fly off the handle. I have learned that my 'yes' needs to be 'yes' and my 'no' needs to be 'no'. I've worked diligently to be a woman of my word. I still die daily to that promise of waivering in the flesh.  Not just that, but when it is a small decision between two people there is trust involved and when one of you makes a change it breaks that trust. It can determine how we handle larger decisions in the future.
I have worked hard to be trusting of a man. I hold onto the scripture "let God be true and every man a liar." Romans 3:4 I am not perfect, I strive to be better than I was and I continue to be all that I can be for God and others as he molds me to be. I am faaar from perfect.
God was using our decision making to be a lesson for Rodney. I don't know how this will work out, I don't know if this will alter the situation, but what I do know is that no matter what side we are on; it's a sacrifice. It is a sacrifice to be a woman/man of our word. It is a sacrifice to keep your mind and eyes on the those things which are pure, noble, pure, lovely, good report, or praiseworthy.
God made a sacrificial decision when he came off of his throne to be beaten beyond recognition for the sin in our lives. We are all guilty of placing Jesus on the cross. It was a sacrifice for him and he loves us so much to do that. He is worthy of me and you writing down our victories, answered prayers, and even our angry moments.
Thank you Rodney and God for this time of valleys and mountain tops to celebrate God's resurrection.

~BUT GOD!

Waiting on the Lord...yay right!

Up until Wednesday I was in distress. I was concerned over the unknown events coming up in my life. In two weeks or so Rodney and I will be attending a church that is not a church he is attending nor I am attending. I attended a local church for four plus years and the Lord lead me out to go to a woman's bible study and from that move I became a leader in the class. In a short time, He has changed my life and I am leaving this class.
Stepping back. The church I attended I truly enjoyed and I felt comfortable there so why was the Lord leading me away to this ladies' class I wondered. In time it was revealed to me as it was to you now. Yet, I was comfortable in transitioning to a new class and new church with a new agenda; I was at peace.
I was comfortable in going because I knew the ladies in the class, some of the people in the church and it was good.
Fast forward to today. I am not so comfortable. I am heading out on a new road into the darkness. I don't know why I am being transplanted (again) other than Rodney and I attending one church together. I don't know what I am going to be doing in the church besides learning God's truth. Yes, perhaps that is all that I am suppose to do now. However, I am a doer of the word. I don't want to be on the sidelines, looking through the glass to see what others are doing but be involved.
There are other issues to moving away from my current church into a new church. I am comfortable and my world is being shaken up. I do not like it.
During this week of my trials I felt lead to encourage someone else. I mean after all if I can't encourage myself why not encourage someone else, right?  Here I am thinking that my friend is in distress over her situation so I wanted to encourage her with expressing my gratitude for her being in my life. Don't discount what I am saying, I truly do appreciate her and my intentions were to encourage her without receiving anything in turn.  Little known to me I was the one that was encouraged.
Her words confirmed that what I said encouraged her, but it was four small short words that she used to sign off with that encouraged me..."waiting on the Lord."
I pondered over these four words for a short time and then chuckled.

Sometimes we get so comfortable, as I did, that we don't want our worlds shaken up. Sometimes we get so involved in what we are doing that we don't want to be interrupted. Think about this one. You are engaged into a movie and the exciting part is just about to take place, the music gives it's ambiance, and your DVD or television goes into the ant races. That is what I am talking about, interrupted to the point of frustration. You want to see the next scene.

In my distress I didn't want to wait on the Lord. I didn't want to be patient to see what He is going to do. I want to know now what is going to happen and what I am going to be doing. To make a decision to wait on the Lord takes faith, trust, loyalty, and devoutness. I thought I had these until I read those four words.
I dropped to my knees and told the Lord "I choose to wait on you Lord. I choose to wait for you to tell me what to do next, I choose to take one moment at a time, I choose to wait for you to show me why things happen the way they do and I choose to let you be in control." I must say it wasn't easy, but I said it and I did it.
After I surrendered to God's will and not my own and made the choice to wait, I had a peace come over me; at least for a while.
My friend's husband came to the radio station and when I saw him, my tears fell. I was hurting for their family. Yet again, I was comforted by his words. He appeared to be at peace and I was the one torn up inside. WOW!
I tell you all this to make a point. We worry, stress, and concern ourselves over so many things when we don't have to. When we think the world is coming to an end it should be okay with us because God is in control people. We are our own worst enemy. We think we can change things by worrying or stressing over a situation.  We think we should know what is going to happen next when really we should only think about what is going to take place in the next few moments.
So, if you are like me and in a transition of your life, wait upon the Lord and allow Him to guide your steps. He's all ready journaled our days down, we just have to walk through it peacefully. Surrender your worries, concerns, and those uncomfortable feelings you have in the pit of your stomach to the one who already knows they are there. He is big enough to handle them, after all He's got the whole world in His hands.

Waiting on the Lord
~Marjorie