Grief and Death: Old Friends

We all have experienced death in our lifetime from friends, family, and co-workers. Death has a way of taking people out of our lives quickly through car accidents or slowly through illnesses. No matter what though, we all either choose to grieve or not to grieve. What about grieving while the person is still alive?

I mean, we have friends and family in our lives that we know are going to die, but why grieve now? 

Sometimes we don't even know we are grieving. 

It's ironic. We know that one day all of us are going to die and meet our maker. So why do we wait to grieve before that phone call, email, text, or Facebook message comes? Why do we wait to the last minute to grieve? I recently asked a friend of mine that very question. She told me, that for so long there were no programs to help us with grief. There were limited help on grieving. Now there are all kinds of study on how grief affects our body, mind, and soul. 

Today I got the news that a friend of mine that I grew up with has died. I am grieving for the loss of her smile. I got news this past month that my sister has cancer and is in stage four. I have a friend that is getting older and  less healthy every day. Aren't we all going to die one day? Listening to my friend from Hospice made me realize that I am surrounded by death and I might be grieving early. 

Honestly, I got off the phone and said, "right, I'm not grieving." The more I thought about it and the more that I recognized all the people around me that are not as healthy as they once were or already died; I just might be grieving and still grieving. 

August will mark another year of my father's passing out of this life.I can't decide to celebrate or if I am still grieving. I know that my friends at Hospice always have their doors open and have a counselor ready to listen. You might think it is ridiculous to talk to someone about grief when the person is still alive, but I believe that it is better to be prepared than to face it at the last moment. 

Jesus talked about his death to his disciples before it took place. He was trying to help them understand that his death was going to come and though they may grieve it was for a worthy cause (John 14). He told his disciples that where He was going they could not go yet. Isn't that what is happening or happened to those who have died before us. We are unable to go where they have gone because it is not our time. So what do we do while waiting?  I say let our light shine Let us be a reflection of the love our friends invested in us to shine and invest into others. Let's leave a legacy, a memorial, a remembrance, a token of love for others to see. 

Be encourage that it's not too early to grieve.

Make A Difference

Driving to work can sometimes be boring. I don't have a working radio in my van. Recently I've started listening to the downloaded music or radio stations on it.  One morning I was on my way to work and had a song on my mind. So I went to my downloaded music and began searching for the song
"Generous Mr. Lovewell" by MercyMe. I met MercyMe back in 2011 and asked what inspired them to produce this son.  Bart said "we wanted to do something fun and we enjoy Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart Club Band." But when you listen to the words of the song,    it is much deeper than Sgt. Pepper. you've heard the saying "one person can make a difference"? You and I CAN make a difference in a person's life. Sometimes  it's the clerk behind the register who has a sick child on her mind. It might be a child that has been yelled at all day by his parent(s). It just might be the elderly man is missing his wife who died just a few months prior.
One small act of kindness might be all he needs to smile and feel good about himself.
Clowns try to make people laugh, why? A smile can change one's attitude quickly. Better than a smile, laugh; just laugh it will change your perspective too.
If you have the opportunity to make a difference in someone's life, I encourage you to do it well and with love. Do it today because it might be the only chance you get..  I believe you will get a blessing from it in turn.

~Encourage someone else today

Luke 6:3
But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil.

Drops of Rain Tell a Story

We've been having a lot of rain lately; I am thankful. Looking out my window at work, I can see drops of rain pouring out of the heavens or down off of the roof of our building. Some drops are light small while others look hard and large.Some of the rain drops are coming fast while others are slow. I think of our blessings and curses that God tells us about. He showers us with his blessings and they come quickly while the curses come slow (Deuteronomy 28). Then I think of when we do have blessings they might be coming down so quickly that we don't see them just like the rain. Now the curses that come slowly are more apparent. They are the ones that hurt, like the large and hard rain drops coming down. They are the troubles in our life, circumstances that may sway us away from God instead of towards Him.
During one of the storms in my life, I chose to change my life and turn to Christ. When these hard and large drops of rain comes, now known as troubles, I chose to run to run for covering in Christ.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes during my storms, I've often thought about running from God and doing what makes me feel better.  However, I know I can't turn my back on the Lord who is ruler over my life. He has blessed me with so many blessings (like the light small but fast rain drops). I can only find peace and joy in Him. Even when I don't think he is listening; he is listening to me. When I think he doesn't see me; He sees me. When I ask him to show himself to me, he drops a blessing in my lap, in my wallet, or from a friendly face.
So regardless of the rains that come down, no matter what they look like, I am praise my God for all He has done and will do in my life. The word tells us that as we draw near to him, he draws near to us. I took that literally today. I didn't have a prayer on my lips. I had thanksgiving and I cried out in my storm for the Lord to show himself to me today. I chose to draw close to Him although I do not "feel" Him.
In the course of my day, he blessed my wallet and he showed me a friendly face to say "I see  you."  That is an amazing God who is greater than my pain, louder than my voiceless prayers, and stronger than my problems.
I hope you will take cover in the Lord today from your storm.
"Bring the Rain" by MercyMe explains it better than I probably could ever write it out. Although I tried.

Saying "Yes is easy....to say "I'll follow" Is Not

Saying "yes" to accepting Jesus in my heart was easy. But to say "yes, I'll follow you" is not. To say
"yes, I will let go of my heavy junk" is not. Have you experienced a death of a relationship or job without knowing what the next step is? It's uncomfortable and dark.  How about riding a roller coaster or a water slide that has a lot of turns and twist in it? You don't know if you'll jolt your back out of joint or your knees will get scrapped because the level of water might be too low.
Most of these requires a step into the unknown; a leap of faith. When you are hired for to do a  job at company b and have to give your resignation to company a, you have a plan and a purpose. But diving into the unknown can be a bit frightening. Saying yes to Jesus and not knowing what you are saying yes too can be just as hard like dealing with a death of a relationship or job without a plan.
Either way it can be rewarding. I remember hearing from an acquaintance how he gave his life to Jesus and it appeared that life got worse instead of better. He was in fear of losing his job, moved from home to home, lost everything he did own in the house he was living in. I told him to hold fast to Jesus, stand on his word and He will take care of you and restore you.  God is giving him more than he could ask or imagine these past few weeks.
So why is it so easy to tell someone just how good God is and how he is a man of his word, but have difficulty believing in it yourself? Sometimes, just like a job we've had for so long, it becomes comfortable. Yet, when we let go and allow God to work in our lives we know that it is going to be much better than before. We've experienced it. So why is it so difficult?
Do you know the song by MercyMe "So Long Self"?
Here listen for a few moments and I'll elaborate.

.

When we go on adventures in life, we say "I'm closing a chapter in my life and beginning a new one." When we die to our-self and allow God to work a new and good work within us, it is the same way. We say "so long self, I'm not who I use to be. I don't think like I once did; I'm changing my stinking thinking and you can't stop me."  I kind of laugh at this song because I've often imagined packing up all of my old habits, hurts, and hangups and sent them out the door.
God is doing something inside me. I don't know what He is doing, it's uncomfortable. I've resolved to allow him to make necessary changes to make me a better vessel for Him.
Again, I don't know what it looks like, it's dark ahead, but just as he knows what is just around the corner, I know he knows me.


Be encouraged that change is difficult but it will be rewarding if you hold fast to Jesus. Have faith and take that step into the unknown, it might be your next comfort zone. 


  

My Broken Heart

Right from the start I'm going to share with you that my heart is heavy. In today's world the mention of the word "cancer" just puts people into a state of panic, uncertainty, and most of all an emotional roller coaster.
Funny though, God tells us about the curses that will come upon us and in some translations it names the curse as "cancer."  I know I've seen it in Deuteronomy, Proverbs, and Isaiah.
Most of us are affected by cancer in one way or another. Today I am affected by cancer through my sister. Her name is Audrey Lynn. Audrey Lynn has no children, married a little later in life than most of us girls, and was recently having trouble breathing, only to find water on her lungs and stomach. She was then tested and it came out positive for peritoneal cancer. It is rare and there is no cure but it can go into remission. I haven't read all there is about this cancer, but I will.
I have memories flooding my mind  since my brother and mother told me it is in stage 4. Just hearing the term "stage 4" made me think of a red flag on fire. I know it's bad.  I've been trying to keep my junk in my trunk, but at some point I have to let it out. It comes in sheets and it comes in trickles.  I am thankful for good friends around me to allow me to cry and share though.
I've been thinking of our life growing up together. It's kind of ironic. When we were younger I wanted what she got. If she got a new bike, I wanted one. She got a new pair of glasses and I lied and said eye sight was bad and I got glasses. We both got skates at the same time. This is the only thing in life that I don't want. There I said it and it hurts. It hurts like getting your finger stuck in a door hinge. I don't wish this disease on anyone, especially my family nor myself. It struck my father who passed away from cancer and now my sister. I am sure that there are people outside my door that have had two or more family members die from cancer. It isn't comforting, but it is truth.
Is believing that my sister is going to live a long life with me going to make me feel better? What if I am determined that God will perform a miracle? Will these thoughts of mine change her status? I think not. I don't want to be brushed on the back and be told it's going to be all right. Of course it is because God is in control. Speaking of which, I've heard whispers today "God's grace is enough." "God's grace." Yes God does extend grace and it is ONLY by His grace that we both are still alive today.
As I sit here venting to you, my friend, I realize that I am angry. Angry at who? God? I can't be angry at God, he loves her more  than I do. At myself? Perhaps.  I got married young and left my home in Virginia, moved to Florida and haven't moved back since. My leaving or staying was not going to have an affect on her getting cancer, I know. It just hurts that I can't be there at this time of her life.
Talking with Audrey Lynn today gave me a little hope. She is determined to think more positively than I am. She is determined that the doctors are going to be able to do what they say they cannot do. We'll see.
The most comforting thing about my relationship with all of my family is that we will see each other in the next life. God knew this for our days were written before we were even conceived. Even that thought doesn't help my broken heart. I want to "just get over it" but I can't.
Today I listened closely to the words from songs such as "I finally made it home" by MercyMe and "Great is our God" by Chris Tomlinson. The words in these songs were powerful to me today. There is much to be said about songs and the lyrics that make them what they are. These songs really touched my brokenness. I had to lift my hands up to praise God in the midst of this brokenness because no matter how much I or my sister is in pain; God is still Lord of all.
God's mercy and grace is new everyday. Without God in my life, I don't know how I would be able to deal with this situation. All I can say is thank you Lord for chasing me for as long as you did and loving me all the way through my hurts and hang-ups.
~Be Encouraged, His mercies are new everyday and it is by grace through faith we are saved


If you are hurting like I am know that God is closer than a brother, He loves a broken heart and is ready to hear you and cry with you.  You may also want to talk to someone about your pain. There is nothing to be ashamed of. 
~Marjorie

Confirmation from "For A Season"

On my blog entry yesterday, June 20th, I wrote about how God has me to be still and know He is God. Early this morning, around 4am, I woke from a deep sleep. I attempted to go back to sleep but instead I heard "Come to me." I tried to ignore the  voice and attempted again to go back to sleep and again I heard "come to me." So I got up and went to my favorite chair with a blanket, a notebook, my devotional book, and Bible in hand. My devotion for the day was a vehicle God used to confirm my peace and showed me that I am doing what He's lead me to do.
My devotion is from a book my friend Bonnie gave me called "My Utmost For His Highest" by
Oswald Chambers.
"There are times you can't do what you want to do.  When God brings a time of waiting and appears to be unresponsive don't fill it with busyness, just wait. The time of waiting may come to teach you the meaning of holy- or it may come after the process of sanctification. has begun  to teach you what service means. At first you may see clearly what God's will is-the severance of a friendship, the breaking off of a business relationship, or something else you feel is distinctly God's will for you to do."
WOW,  WOW, WOW! Don't you love it when God confirms His work?
Now the downside of this is that one word I read... "teach." Specifically in this text "teach you," teach me what?  Isn't that what my friend said yesterday?
"The teacher doesn't give the answers to the test before handing out the test." The teacher will give you the lesson before the test; God is the answer to my test. "
Oh my goodness. I am going through some pruning, being molded by the potter, the test is a test and I know why now. He is sanctifying me. Okay so what does  this word mean exactly? Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary says that "it is to set apart to a sacred purpose or to religious use: Consecrate. How sweet it is. I don't know the plan Jesus has for me, but  I know he loves me enough to prune and  mold me for His purpose. 
You know through this small journey of mine, I hope you see my relationship with a true living and active God of Love. I pray that your desire is to be as close to the Lord just as the scripture reads "as close as a brother." 


I don't know what you are coming against, trusting in, or looking for, what I do know is God is interested in YOU! He is concerned over the smallest details of your life.  Surrender to Him today and meet with him for coffee and conversation.  You won't know unless you start talking so go and meet with Him somewhere cozy.


~Be encouraged! 

Be still doesn't mean that nothing is happening but that something special is. 

"For A Season"

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:

² A time to be born,
    And a time to die;
A time to plant,
    And a time to pluck what is planted;
³ A time to kill,
    And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
    And a time to build up;
⁴ A time to weep,
    And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
    And a time to dance;
⁵ A time to cast away stones,
    And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
    And a time to refrain from embracing;
⁶ A time to gain,
    And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
    And a time to throw away;
⁷ A time to tear,
    And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
    And a time to speak;
⁸ A time to love,
    And a time to hate;
A time of war,
    And a time of peace.

In one morning, within two hours of itself, I heard he same exact words from three different people; "for a season."  

I recently have been going through a personal struggle. My struggle has not been with falling backwards into sin, but wanting to know where God wants me to worship Him at. I have been in tears over the thought of having to choose over two places. Then God clearly gave me an answer in only His way. 

First I kept coming across the thought “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” He was telling me to just "be." This to me says that it is okay to  be in the here and now. I am to take one day at a time, one hour at a time, and one moment at a time and rest in Him.

Next, there are other decisions that have come across my path for me to pray over and seek God's face on. I have found my answer in this decision. He has me in a situation for only "a season." I also believe he doesn't give us His whole plan of the future because we cannot handle it or there is more orchestrating on His part that has to take place. So for now, I am doing what He wants me to and I am doing it well. 

Last I could feel overwhelmed with the transition at my home, but I am not. I believe that is where I have my haven. I have a roof over my head, that I am grateful for. I have a place to rest and be at peace in, which I am ecstatic about. Though there are boxes everywhere, I know it will one day they will be empty and things will have their place. 

Looking at the scripture above the second line caught my eye the most. "a time to plant and time to uproot." I look at life this way. There is always a season of planting ourselves in good soul making our roots strong in the Lord and in the places he sets us. There have been some churches that I have sat in that was cold and desolate, some that were warm and inviting, some that had this group or that group to belong to like a social club. God's word that will exalt Him among the nations and in the earth is what matters; not a church. A church is inside me, not a building with four walls. 

 Next there is a time to be uprooted and repositioned in new soil. Our roots are strong when are grounded in the word. It doesn't matter where we are transplanted, as long as we are well grounded and rooted in the word. I know God wants me to be among believers and I know what He has currently called me to do. Where I am in my life right here and right now is exactly where God wants me to be. I am doing exactly what He has called me to do. I am grounded and finally at peace. I don't have to choose because I don't have to follow anyone but God. 

I have a husband who, I THANK GOD, has been where I am in my spiritual journey. He has been with me through my struggle, sees me struggling, and the end result is that God has prepared his heart to agree with mine. I have not experienced this EVER in my life. 

So I am in "a season" that I can be at rest in the Lord, in his Word and in His covering. No one can take Him away from me except me, and I choose to run to Him in all I do and all I am called to do. 

The teacher doesn't give the answers to the test before handing out the test. The teacher will give you the lesson before the test; God is the answer to my test. "Be still and know that I am God, come to me and rest." I do enjoy this season of my life now. 

You know the best part? I can feel a difference in my smile. I have a smile today that I didn't have yesterday. I can feel a difference in my walk. I have a spring in my step. 

~Be encouraged, Jesus is with you in your season too.  

Growth....It's a Process

I have two people in my life that in the past year I have had the honor of praying with and for, helping in a time of their need, and after a year I see where their paths have lead them. One of my two friends is a girl, so naturally now you know the other is a _________, yes boy.
The young lady has been pressing into the Lord's word, dancing with Him, healing through him, and she alone is definitely not the same young woman I met a year ago. I see her growth and the love she has in her heart for a desired change. Her life was upside down, she was so concerned for her children that she couldn't concentrate on anything else; most of all herself. When she walked you could see the load of troubles carried on her shoulders. Today, her load is so much lighter. She has a spring in her step, a song on her heart, and joy in her eyes. She is a treasure to know.
My young lad is still struggling, he wants to trust in the Lord, but has a difficult time doing it. I have had the honor of meeting his wonderful family. He travels to wherever he can for work, even if it's in another state, just to feed them and pay the bills. Now he is in such a position that I don't know how to help but to call on the name of Jesus for His provision. I wanted to help too, but all I could do was lead him back to who God is; Jehovah Jireh. The same God who provided a way for Abraham with a ram at the same time he was about to sacrifice his only son Isaac. God showed himself to provide when there appeared to be no provision. I pray for my friend to truly seek God's face and grow in that faith.
I don't know if it is more difficult for men to trust in a man they cannot see than it is for a woman. I do know that for a woman who wants to be held, it is difficult to feel an invisible God. Yet, when we surrender we can.  I do know that for a man, he is called to be a warrior, a man that fixes things, yet he can't fix everything or he would have no need for a God.
Sometimes, I want the Lord to just have me stick with women, I can understand them much better; I am one. Yet, I have two male friends come across my mind that the Lord is saying "see, you helped them though, look at them now."
My friend Craig, once said to me "you don't know who all you affect after you talk with them or meet them. You may not know until you get to heaven."  He is right, we don't know who is affected by our words or actions. We may never know. What I do know is  that those who have walked on my path and have given me God's word, helped me during my struggles and don't know who I am or where I am today, are the very ones I want to be and meet in heaven. I don't know who I affect, but I am excited to know that by the grace of God there goes I.
Seeing others change their life like I did gives me great joy. Those that I know are on the road of redemption and restoration I am excited for. Growth in a person is the greatest gift anyone could ever give me. It is with great joy that I am on the front lines for Jesus. I am excited to be doing His work wherever He puts me. It may be in the lion's den, but I know my God is with me. With God all things are possible and without Him I cannot do anything. It is the same for you and me.
If you are like my sister, who has experienced great growth with her relationship with Christ, I can't wait to meet you. If you are like my brother who is still struggling with his growth in trusting Christ, keep pressing onward, strive for the prize of peace, joy, love, and self control found in trusting in Jesus Christ.
Never surrender to the enemy and Never give up to his tactics. The Lord has a plan and promise to prosper you not to harm you but to give you a hope and a future.

Be Encouraged by Growth

Be Encouraged with Confidence

There is so much to the story of Lazarus and Jesus. I caught this special glimpse into my own life after reading the story again from John chapter 11 beginning with verse 40.
Jesus responded, “Didn’t I tell you that you would see God’s glory if you believe?” ⁴¹ So they rolled the stone aside. Then Jesus looked up to heaven and said, “Father, thank you for hearing me. ⁴² You always hear me, but I said it out loud for the sake of all these people standing here, so that they will believe you sent me.”
This prayer showed confidence in who he was in God. You may say well he was God, but he had a lot of persecution coming agianst him. He was human too remember and he had feelings as you and I do too.
As I read this story I thought about myself and how I have not trusted my own thoughts, fear of speaking out my thoughts and being rejected. I didn't want to sound ignorant nor stumble over my words.I trusted God in the small things but not the large things. 
Then I began to recognize how I would answer a question before the person asking could finish it. I also had to make a conscience effort to trust what I was going to say. This was hard for me. Then I had a friend share with me a scripture and said "you can have confidence in who you are because of Christ Jesus' confidence in himself."  Need more explanation? Christ lives in you when you accept his eternal gift of salvation. The word says that apart from God you can do nothing, but with God all things are possible.  I can have confidence that my words coming from my thougths are not stupid, ignornant, or a waste of hot air. My thoughts may be wrong, but they are my thoughts. If I think a thought and know it smells bad, then I need to change that thought, take it captive and refocus on the confidence in Christ I should have.
Have you ever been asked a question, the answer pops in your head, but you lack confidence and don't answer it? You find later that the thought you had was the right answer? This shows lack of confidence.
Wake up-trust yourself or at least trust in Jesus Christ that lives in you.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable to Christ. Be quick to listen and slow to speak. Having faith of a mustard seed will help you to change the stinking thinking, lack of confidence, and find reassurance in Jesus Christ who lives inside you.
If you find that you have failed in trusting your own thoughts and haven't answered because you lack that confidence, try it again when the situation arises. 

~Be Encouraged

What you have to say IS important!

Front Lines

It is almost a full year since I have heard the term "front line."  A year ago a radio celebrity asked what my position was at Hope FM. I prceeded to tell him that I was "just" the office manager. He replied with "I have respect for you. Your job is the toughest because you're on the front lines. Us dj's (I was among 5 at a round table) are behind the mic in a closed room. The office managers deal with the real issues." I didn't think about that statement until just the other day. People have called or come in the office in need of prayer or a hug. Some people need a sound board,  compassion, strength and sometimes tough love.
In the past my eyes were opened to the reality that I am on the front lines of this spiritual warfare. I was chosen by God to be in this place to do His work through Him. His word tells me so. In this process, I have to recognize when I too need a shoulder to cry on, a soundboard, compassion, strength, and sometimes tough love. Most of the time all we need is prayer and we're too prideful to ask for it.
The people I meet may not study the scriptures, look for evidence of the resurrection, or even do a word research but one thing I do know, they encounter the resurrected Messiah when they encounter me.
For I know my reedemer lives, I spoke to him this morning.


~Be encouraged
The same God of yesterday walking with Adam and Eve is the same God you encounter in others when you look for Him.

Before I took the trash out today from work, I had to wrap the handles around my fingers and palm of my hand. I had to ensure the heavy bags didn't drop and I could carry them over my shoulder. As I began to walk I thought..."they are getting heavy." So I sat three of the four bags down and readjusted the weight. Off to walking towards the dumpster I went. With each step I took, the bags began getting heavier. I started to take inventory of what was packed in these bags. I had to laugh. What difference does it make what is in these trash bags? It isn't going to change the weight of the bags, the direction I was headed in, or their demise.

I work with ladies that are hurting and healing from some deep hurts in their life. I thought about how we are beginning to take inventory of our lives. Some of the things we are facing are heavy and the more that we ignore them the more foul smelling they become; like trash. The hurts are so heavy that they affect other people in our lives including ourselves. It is like a wound that isn't cleaned out, it becomes infected; like trash with maggots.  The trash I was taking out went into a dumpster,  but what happens to the hurts we walk around with when WE die? I would have to say that is the trash that will weight us down into the depths of death itself. 

 The Bible has something to say about our health and hurts in Pslam 38:3-5

There is no soundness in my flesh

Because of Your anger,
Nor any health in my bones
Because of my sin.
⁴ For my iniquities have gone over my head;
Like a heavy burden they are too heavy for me.
⁵ My wounds are foul and festering
Because of my foolishness.


So the next time you are ready to take out the trash in your own life, remember to take inventory and throw the foul and festering foolishness out and keep the loving and cherished in. 




~Be encouraged
Marjorie

Why Do Bad Things Happen to Good People?

Lately I have been thinking about how dark, lonely, depressed, afflicted, and desolate people are who do not even try to accept the concept that there is a living God.  I have people ask me, perhaps you do to, "why do bad things happen" or "why do bad things happen to good people." I didn't really know how to respond but this morning I found it.
Psalms 107:33-38
He changes rivers into deserts,
    and springs of water into dry, thirsty land.
³⁴ He turns the fruitful land into salty wastelands, (yuck!)
    because of the wickedness of those who live there.
³⁵ But he also turns deserts into pools of water,
    the dry land into springs of water.
³⁶ He brings the hungry to settle there
    and to build their cities.
³⁷ They sow their fields, plant their vineyards,
    and harvest their bumper crops.
³⁸ How he blesses them!
    They raise large families there,
    and their herds of livestock
We go through life having good things turn bad because of our behavior.  I know that every parent, unless they are lazy, that have children (or dogs) discipline them. I would wager that even the worst parent disciplines their child for stealing from a store or hitting another child. Why? I believe a parent disciplines to teach a child right from wrong.  God allows for curses to come to individuals to drive the person back to His loving arms.  Now you may say "I was never in His arms in the first place." Well, according to God you were created by his hands and I am sure you were in his arms. But that statement is for another day.
The person who lives without God misses out on a love that is true, kind, consistent, no pre-set agendas, misses his benefits, and looses out on hope and a future.
I ask you today that if you know of someone that is missing out on God, ask the Lord to draw him closer to Himself through their circumstances. If you are someone questioning God and his existence, ask God to reveal himself to you; He will. 

Be encouraged today for someone who is without hope for tomorrow
~Marjorie

For the Brokenhearted

Have you ever felt your heart split right down the middle? I see it on phones, in Hallmark cards, on notes and letters and think it is a cute and sweet cartoon.

However, when your heart in your chest is truly breaking, it's not so sweet or cute. 

Recently I have had to face a few hurts in my life. One of these hurts that I am facing I thought I was over, you know..done with. I forgave the person and went on my merry way; never looking back. However, something changed the skip in my step.  The hurt rose up again and I was more broken than before. 

I was taught to count it all joy when I fall into trials (hurt is no exception) knowing that the testing of my faith produces patients. When I hurt I want the hurt to stop right then, but I know it doesn't.. Sometimes the hurt lingers like a soar thumb.  I am to wait it out in order to allow myself to grow stronger during a time I feel so vulnerable. So where does your strength come from? 

When I was fourteen years old, there was  young man I had deep feelings for. He broke my heart and I thought I heard it break it was so painful. I know it took time for my heart to heal, but I didn't help it heal in a good way, but in a way that caused me to turn from God and towards other men. This definitely wasn't a healthy way to heal. It only caused me more heartache. It took me almost 30 years to figure that out. So now, I have a broken heart again, only this time, I have a partner, whom I adore, to help me walk through this hurt. However, he can't fix it like most men want to fix things. 

So the only thing I know to do is to put ALL of my trust in the Lord, hold on fast for the changes that may be coming, and be willing to be transformed into a new creature. I feel like I am in a straight jacket though and have no control. Oh, wait...I don't, not honestly.  You and I are only in control of our reactions to other people's actions. So here is a shift in my broken heart as I write to you. I can choose to be happy, I can choose to say "I love you my brother/sister." I can look at the happy times instead of the sad times, and I can offer forgiveness and look for the lesson in the pain.  So, how do you handle pain? Do you give it a temporary fix I like I use to? Do you find healthy ways to change your stinking thinking? 

However you choose to handle pain, I hope you will count it all joy also and remember:

Psalm 30:5b

 Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning.

Marjorie's interpretation is our hurt will last only for a short time but joy will always appear after the tears. 

Have a blessed day and be encouraged!

Codependent to Interdependent...What's That?

I use to wonder what it meant to be "codependent." I was labeled that for a very long time without really knowing what it meant. So if you are like I was and clueless about this term this is what the Miriam-Webster Dictionary says it is:

Codependency: a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (as an addiction to alcohol or heroin); broadly : dependence on the needs of or control by another"

I went to a recovery group "for the other person"and found that I was the one that needed to be rescued. I then made a choice to be only dependent on God. This was a good place to be. I was in God's boot camp. 

Now at least 4 years later, I am still in God's boot camp called "Inter-dependency." 

I heard this word just recently at a marriage conference in Jacksonville called 'Weekend to Remember" hosted by Family Life Today . I literally asked the Lord, "what is that word and what does it have to do with me?" It was as if he replied "I am so glad you asked, Marjorie." That same day, Sunday, the response was given to me. 

I have lived most of my adult life, literally since 18 years of age, in a co-dependent lifestyle. I would always be attracted to the guys that were controlling or manipulative. So, here we are in a new world called "marriage by the Creator."  The women's speaker was gracious enough to give us a visual.  You have two hands.

His hands            Her hands

The fingers represent his strengths and the other fingers are her strengths.  The spaces between the fingers are the weaknesses of the other.  So now, place your fingers against each other.

Together you are both strong, but then shift your hands to where his strengths fit to fill her weaknesses and vice verse. You now have an interdependent relationship.

                 

From the Bing dictionary, interdependent means: depending on each other: unable to exist or survive without each other "interdependent organisms" 2.  with mutually dependent elements: relying on mutual assistance, support, cooperation, or interaction among constituent parts or members.

I read this and thought "wow!"  This is what relationships are suppose to be about.  

I was saddened by the news that friends of mine are headed for the divorce court. Our society is clueless on what a relationship truly means. I was clueless. Our world tells us we are to do what makes us "feel" good and yet doing what makes us "feel" good in the end makes us feel like crap. 

Listen to what I'm saying. We get married because we go on what makes us "feel" good. One day we're arguing and don't "feel" like making things work. We "feel" like divorcing him because he didn't make me "feel" good about myself. 

I am going to get divorced because she doesn't make me "feel" like a man. She is doing her own thing that makes her "feel" good, so I'm going to go out and cheat on her because it makes me  "feel" good.

Wake up world, it's about interdependence and NOT independence or co dependence.

I can only wish I had someone sharing with me the knowledge I now hold. I can hear it now "here comes hurricane 'Marjorie' down the road. People move out of her way." "She is and independent woman on the rampage."
"Oh no, it's been reported that hurricane Marjorie  has just ruined the lives of 3 men or more.  Is there no stopping this beast of a storm?"   "oh boy, children are affected by this monster of a storm too!"

I don't know where you are in your relationship with your self, friends, family, spouse, or ex spouse, but I can tell you that we can all live in an interdependent relationship if we would work a little harder at it.  Winners never quit and quitters never win. 

Want to win at being a good listener?  Want to be a winner instead of a quitter? 

I encourage you to visit the website Family Life Today or listen to them on 91.3 Hope FM weekdays at 6:30pm EST.  Love like you mean it, it will change your life forever!

Be encouraged today to have an interdependent relationship!

Marjorie

Stop Beating Yourself Up and Be Lifted Up

Have you done things in your life that left you feeling so miserable you felt there was no good inside you? Felt dirty inside and no matter the length of the shower or how hot the water got you still felt dirty inside?
I have. I've done things that if my mother knew, she would still send me outside to fetch for a hickory switch and then pop me with it more than once on my behind. I deserve the punishment if she knew. There is nothing worse though than beating my self up; not even a hickory switch.
Can you relate?
BUT GOD! He says there is nothing that I've done (or you) that can keep Him from loving me. Imagine that kind of an unconditional love. I don't know of a man on earth that has that kind of deep and wide love; do you? Jesus is the only one that clean our messes up. 
Recently, the Lord woke me up early in the morning to tell me that I broke his heart. I asked him "how?" He showed me that  previous night I spent time on the computer playing a game "Jewel" online and then after I got bored with that game, I went to my phone and played another game. He showed me how in the mornings I may pray with him, but do not meditate on His Word. I began to cry. The fact that I could break God's heart. God, you know The Creator of the universe? Yes, him.
He cares about our relationship enough to hurt over it.  The next day, he said to me that we, Rodney and I, have not spent time in his Word either. He told me we are grieving him. He says, I have given you many things. I have pulled you out of your pit, I have set  you on a rock, and I have given you a man that loves me more than you. I am moving you from one place to another, but that does not mean that you can't spend time with me. I recognized I was beginning to rely on my own understanding of what should take place, do my own thing, and I began saying "okay, Lord, I got it now."   BUT NO! That is not living a Christ centered life or having a Christ centered relationship. Breaking away from God's word can even put a strain on ones relationship with her spouse. I don't want to give the enemy any stronghold, or open door for him to steal,  kill, or destroy my relations with others. Yet, that is exactly what I was beginning to do.
I am sometimes my worst enemy. 
If you read the book of Psalm you find a lot about wisdom, understanding, patients, kindness, and hope. I was lead to read Psalm 39. David wrote how he was expressive to God about his sins and did not express it those around him. He usually wrote telling of his yucky puckies, but not in this one. David also speaks of trusting in God and having found hope in Him. At one point David was in such anguish that he wanted the time to pass quickly so that he could get over himself. David knew that his only deliverance was going to be found in God. David wanted a close intimate relationship with God and he also knew that he had to repent for his sins so that there was no bearer. God gives blessings but like the end of this poem, David is blessing the Lord.
You see, I was drifting away from God just enough for Him to show me just how my enemy will use the smallest of things to steal us away from our relationships. God pursued David and he pursues us. He came to me in the early morning hour to tell me I hurt him.  In the end, I have been blessing the Lord. Like David wrote.
"But You, O Lord, be merciful to me, and raise me up, That I may repay them (the friend who has come against David or the enemy). By this, I know that You are well pleased with me, Because my enemy does not triumph over me, As for me, You uphold me in my integrity, And set me before Your face forever.  Blessed be the Lord God Israel From everlasting to everlasting! Amen, Amen." Psalm 39:10-13. I encourage you to read the whole chapter.

Isn't it wonderful to know that as your relationship wtih Christ begins to grow, he is there to help you with every enemy, including yourself. He upholds you and cares about every aspect of your life.  Are you spending time wtih him so that He becomes a familiar friend? Is He more real and transparent to you than before you began pursuing Him?  Dear friend, I hope so.

Just as David was not perfect, you are not. Just as the scriptures says "David was a man after God's own heart." Can you place your name where David's is in that statement?  I hope so. I encourage you to press inward into a love relationship with Christ. He is desiring to be closer to you than a brother. Keep pressing forward for the prize.